Monday, January 5, 2015

Go Out!

Happy 2015 my friends and readers.  After a whirlwind holiday season, I am happy to be back to the routine of carpools, sports, exercise, and the day to day activities of life as a mom. I know that many of you thrive on adventure and spontaneity, but I prefer the simple stillness of routine and structure. I love adventure and I can be whimsical and spontaneous at times, but I much prefer the day to day routines of life—my morning run or hike or spin class, my quiet time with my journal and Bible and coffee, the routine of my kids coming home from school or practice and making them a snack. I like knowing what the day looks like:  planning lunches with friends and appointments and working, serving, and writing. That is why these last two years have been so different and trying for me. I couldn’t predict, plan, or know what was coming next.  I was out of my element. It has been an exercise in complete surrender to God and His plans, not mine. It has been difficult and humbling.

Last year at this time, I was preparing for my second of three surgeries within the year. I spent the first week of 2014 in a hospital room and the first six weeks recovering from surgery. What a difference a year makes. I just got back from a Hawaiian cruise where I hiked a volcanic crater in Hilo, kayaked in Kauai, and ran laps on the ship’s deck. I started my day today with a 3 mile run/walk and then spent an hour journaling and reflecting upon these past weeks. I am so blessed. That is why I started last year with the motto of #blessedbeyondbelief or B3. I didn’t know that the cancer would spread to my lung, that I would have another surgery and more chemo, and that Greg’s dad would die in May. But I still stand upon that motto because no matter the circumstances, I am blessed beyond belief. I have another day. I have another year. 

So I have decided that my motto for 2015 is “Go out”.

I read in my devotional (My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers) and came across this quote:

Each morning as you wake, there is a new opportunity to “go out”, building your confidence in God—do not worry about your life nor about your body….believe God is always the God you know Him to be when you are nearest to Him. Let the attitude of your life be a continual willingness to “go out” in dependence upon God.”

I love Oswald Chambers—I have been reading this daily devotional for years, and each time I re-read it, something is fresh and new. Then I read the passage from the Bible found in Hebrews 11:8.

“By faith Abraham, when called to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going.”

Abraham, in faith, obeyed and went. He trusted God to lead him into the unknown. He had times of trials and times of blessing. Life isn’t all routine and it isn’t all adventure. It isn’t all good and it isn’t all bad. It isn’t always easy and it isn’t predictable and controlled. Life is messy and confusing and joy filled and purposeful. I still struggle with surrendering to God—every single day. I still struggle with trying to control—my circumstances, my mind, my body, my will. But each day, I make the choice to get up and “go out.” Wherever God leads me, there will I go.  If he wants me to be still, I will. If he wants me to reach out to someone, I will. If he wants me to take a risk, I will. If he wants me to slow down, I will try.

I want to learn to obey Him more and go where he leads. I don’t know what this year holds. I know that I have weekly chemo sessions every Friday for up to six months. I don’t know if cancer will come back or if I will be cancer free. All I know is that if I am given a new day, God wants me to “go out” and follow Him.

As you are making whatever goals or resolutions you have for this new year, I pray that you would know Christ, and that He would be at the center of your life. As you surrender to Him, know that it will be a risky adventure. It won’t be routine. He may take you to places you never thought you would be. As you live life each day, realize what a blessing that new day is. Be grateful. Be changed. Make a difference.

Obey and go…and see where the King of Kings may lead you. One adventure at a time.  

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