Finishing the fight round two—here we go! On Monday, September 8-- I will have surgery on my lung to remove the cancerous tumor they found. Things have gone much more smoothly this time around—I think because I have been through it before. It seems that the hardest part of anything in life is the waiting and the unknown…..but truly isn’t that what life is about?
The headlines are frantic before us; the world is in turmoil (hasn't it always been?); there is still poverty, disease, starvation, hunger, rage, and evil surrounding us. And in the midst of all that, little Miss Kirsten is dealing with cancer….again. This surgery will be my third surgery in less than eleven months. My doctor appointments are a regular part of my schedule. I continue spending hours on the phone trying to figure out insurance and billing….but then I look at it with new eyes. I have amazing doctors and surgeons. I have healthcare even though it may frustrate me. I am blessed to be at incredible top notch facilities and hospitals. I have LIFE! I have hope! I have joy!
The past two weeks have been extra busy for us as a family with the boys back in the school routine, soccer and tournaments, more doctor appointments, and prepping for Kirsten the MOM to be in the hospital for up to five days. It is pretty crazy when I think of all the arranging I want to do before I am unavailable for my family next week. Yet, despite all that is on my plate, God has overwhelmed me with his provision and his peace.
There have been numerous times in the last weeks that I have cried out to God—“Lord, I can’t handle this—it is too much!” or “God, another thing thrown my way that I feel is too big and I can’t take care of?? Really??” Yes, it is the continuous control freak in me...as usual. Yet, each time I cry out to God and feel like my faith is waning—He answers as He speaks softly to my heart:
“I’ve GOT THIS!”
This week—God has truly shown me what He means by His provision. Miracles have happened. Friends and family have stepped in the gap. Medical bills have been paid. My hectic schedule has been do-able. The God of the Universe who knows everything about ISIS and Israel and Syria and Palestine— He knows ME. He cares for ME. He provides for ME. He is an almighty God and he is an intimate God. Nothing is too big for him and nothing is too small.
And so, as I head into surgery next week, I go in knowing that Jesus Christ, Lord of Lords has GOT ME. He has given me peace in the storm. I feel His perfect presence, His perfect provision, and his perfect peace.