Deep and True

I am deep into my cancer journey now and I sort of feel like I am in deep waters.  After nine rounds of chemo, and that major reaction, I am still experiencing the side effects of the toxins in my body.  I met with the liver surgeon, and everything seemed to be on track to have surgery in late September and then he came back in and said, “Your colon surgeon may want radiation and more chemo which would push things back to late December”.  Lovely news.  We booked a cruise in late December because we thought this would all be over with.  I am waiting again…..waiting for scans and three doctor appointments and hoping….hoping that we can move forward and I will advocate for myself and my body!

But enough of cancer talk and on to the real meat of today’s blog post—deep.  Deep friendships. Intense, faithful, loyal, strong, rooted friendships.  In the last six months I have experienced the deep meaning of friends and family.  I have never experienced friendship so pure, loyal, and true.

In my past posts I have shared the many things friends and family have rallied to do for me and serve me during this hard time.  I am richly blessed by all those who have come by my side.  My church family, my biological family, my lacrosse and soccer families, my teaching family, my college family, my high school friends family.  So many people across time and place, who have been true to me and have reached out to me.

Last month I had a mini reunion with my college friends.  We were all resident advisors at UCSB together and our friendships have been solid ever since.  We have been in each other’s weddings, we have watched our children grow up, we have travelled together, oh the memories.  We have experienced death and sadness and bitterness and joy throughout the years and we have been there for each other.  Being with these friends means depth and honesty and so much laughter.  We made a pact, again, after 27 years of friendship, that we would continue to reach out to each other for help, support, and trust, in the good times and the bad.  Deep. Raw. Pure. Family.

I have had lunches, brunches, hikes, shopping trips, happy hours, with my many friends.  Life has been deep and rich, and though I have had cancer for over six months, I have never so truly lived and loved.  That is what this one life on earth is for.  Everlasting friendships, relationships and family that are built on solid foundations. I want to keep living like this…..it is right, pure, and deep.

Because of your unfailing love, I can enter your house;
    I will worship at your Temple with deepest awe.  Psalm 5:7